One at a time

Today I’m working from home. Honestly, I’m not doing much (I wouldn’t be writing just now otherwise), but I’ve given my notice and I can’t start any new interesting project, so I’m left with the loose ends of what I was already working on. Not very exciting, plus I’m not going to have any other performance review in this job!

Out there is another wonderful sunny day… I don’t know if I should be more grateful that the weather is good and I can go out for walks and I feel good too, or upset because London is so beautiful  when it’s sunny and I have to move far away in a couple of months and I’m going to miss it sooo much! It would be easier to leave if we had another shitty British summer… Well, I guess I need to concentrate on the present, since that’s what I’ve been forced to do since this IVF story started (*)… and be grateful that the sun is conspiring to help me keep going.

(*) A friend of mine told me that I have to focus on the problems day by day, otherwise they all come into my mind at once and I go mad. So for example today I need to focus on taking my medications and drink plenty of water and DON’T focus on what might happen in ten days when I have my ultrasound scan. Or after that. Or when I have to move and find another accommodation and start a new job in a foreign country and I might be pregnant. See? All at once it’s definitely too much.

Symptoms-wise: slight sore breast, slight pain in the low abdomen mostly on the sides (where the ovaries should be?), tiredness: by the time I finish working I’m exhausted and need a nap, and after that I go to bed early anyway.

My usual IVF nurse is on holiday this week, and asked me to book the appointment for the scan directly with the clinic. Only I’ve been calling everyday and nobody seem to be there to pick up the phone, or call me back after I leave a message! I imagine she will be able to book me in when she comes back, but I don’t like not having an appointment yet for something so important!





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